Understanding Vulnerability

Vulnerability is the cornerstone of deep connection and authenticity. It is where transparency meets discernment and safety to create the perfect sacred dome of connection with yourself and others around you.

It’s how we build connection, community, relationships, education, and healing.

There are three main types of vulnerability I would love to introduce you to, to begin a deeper understanding on this valuable subject:

1. Intellectual vulnerability: Sharing your honest thoughts, belief systems, understandings of the world and concepts, and embracing new insights and perspectives, which is crucial for growth and learning. This also opens you up to potentially welcome outward reflections and feedback for improvement, valuing diverse perspectives with an open mind, utilizing discernment to take what serves and leave the rest.

   
   

2. Emotional vulnerability: Sharing how you are feeling and what you are experiencing, outwardly, to be received by someone or a group of your choosing. This is done in honesty and authenticity, even when discomfort comes up. Vulnerability is pushing through the fear that arises, knowing you have chosen a safe person to share with.

   
   

3. Relational vulnerability: After one has shown you they are trustworthy and willing to meet you with respect and honor, commonly between friends, family, and romantic/sexual partners, this is where you show that person the innermost part of yourself, exposing your needs and feelings in order to connect on an intimate level. This vulnerability takes your relationships a step further, involving the sharing of one's core self, needs and emotions to build profound connections.

Now, one of the hardest parts about vulnerability, at least in my experience, is the pain that follows when someone takes your openness and uses it to hurt you.

This is where discernment comes into play. Vulnerability always can be present, but discernment helps you decipher who gets to see into the depths of your honesty.

Vulnerability can always be present, even if the people you’re around have proven themselves unsafe to show it to, by you being honest with vulnerable with yourself.

This means acknowledging when you are feeling uncomfortable, unsafe, misunderstood, happy, open, confused, silly, and D. All of the above.

The discernment allows you to see which of those authentic feelings you wish to share, and knowing the types of vulnerability can show you how to share it given the environment you are in and the outcome you are hoping to create.

Understanding vulnerability is essential, and feeling safe to be vulnerable is a different journey altogether. Let me know if I can offer guidance on that in another post!